pakikipagkapwa: smooth interpersonal relationships # 1. contradicting someone in a group

>the word

"speak the truth [object] in love [sujbect]" -- ephesians 4:15

this is culturally supported by the filipinos' highest value which is pakikipagkapwa-tao, according to filipino psychology experts. it used to be just pakikisama or smooth interpersonal relationships.

>the misalignment

i felt guilty for not observing this tenet today.

in the seminar i am attending, i contradicted the response of a co-participant by emphatically stating what i've been wanting to say to the group since last week. 

effect: the person never recited again. :-(

>my background

my best subject in philosophy was epistemology, the study of truth.

in a way, my largely westernized education has alienated me from my home / national / natural culture.

i am thankful for this perspective, which allows me to more "objectively" self-critique my cultural heritage, but i need to embrace once more my ROOTS so as not to be ALIENATED from it, myself, and my countrymen (KAPWA), resulting in what the MMPI test calls "SOCIAL ALIENATION."

>resolution 
(as in r = request in the non-violent communication steps contained in the acronym OFNR = observation, feeling, need, & request)

follow the natural tendency of filipinos to use the common practice of using the POLITE introductory words / phrases "perhaps," "it seems," or better still, be INCLUSIVE with "we might go into the extreme...."

>cautionary note: extreme

of course, the extreme of "shadow" of this is to be a chamelion, being completely passive and non-confrontative, which already amounts to a SIN OF OMISSION.